It’s not by any mistake I should come across this quote. In fact, I was prompted by the happenings of my life recently to which I concluded as brought on by a lack of measurable metrics to my ultimate goal – since this goal is grand, knowing where to start is difficult, until I broke it down in a stream of consciousness.
Let’s look at the things I expect to happen in the next 8 months shall we?
I would be working up until January.
Then in January I will be back to school.
The earliest time I can take a trip is in June.
Okay I got the “how”, but do I understand the “why”?
Especially with a timeline like this, it is as if I’d already lived those months up to June – if not then definitely up to January.
I don’t expect anything to happen.
Yesterday my mother told me she was glad I was gonna be home for New Years.
That made me happy for two seconds.
It doesn’t get to me anymore, it seems nothing gets to me anymore.
That part of me that I said died on the way back, may very well be dormant and buried, because my brain wants to protect me from the otherwise slew of emotions, if not emotional pain that would manifest thereafter.
My brain is smart, but it is also tired from playing safeguard against myself.
I cannot afford emotions right now, only logic.
And logically, I need to have more than just words as simple as “keep going”, “this is better for the long run”, “you want to be XYZ, don’t you?”
I need something more time tested than the immediate – it is as if i need validation from one great thinker or another – so I remembered Nietzsche.
“He who has a why to live, can bear almost any how.” – Friedrich Nietzsche
So I thought, why didn’t this work for me in the recent past, what went wrong?
- Things were going too good I forgot about reality.
- I was chasing after temporary relief.
- I didn’t work hard enough.
Here it is again, the “how”.
But what about the motivation, the drive?
What is it that you want bad enough that will propel you to the future like no other?
What is ‘it’ or is it a number of things?
Think about it.