Lately, I’ve been looking for answers again. It seems to be the only logical way to put myself out of my own misery. I need to look for solutions to my “problem” before I waste my time going in circle.
What is my problem you might ask?
It isn’t getting out of here anymore.
I realized now that the whole, “I need to leave.” actually stems from my need to be of use for purposes greater than a mundane job that provides for a ‘comfortable life’.
I recall walking through the streets of Amsterdam at 2AM with a friend and briefly going over the fight I’ve had with my parents.
“No marriage, no husband, no kids.” I’d said.
I remember my dad being upset.
“Don’t you want to do something with your life then?”
Yes. Of course I do – but knowing me, I’m slow to warm to many ideas.
I’m a thinker by nature and picky and those are my faults and strengths.
So now that I’ve got that out of the way, I can focus on myself and visualize the life I want to achieve for myself through action and block out everything else.
So I start reading inspirational things from people who’ve made it. I start doing research long before I’ll actually need them. What else can I do? Ah yes, buff up my skillsets so when it’s finally my time to step up to a “dream job” I’ll not only have the ambitions but also abundant knowledge and resources for it.
And that’s what I’ll do.
I’ll prepare until it is my time.